I Wish

I've heard it said that “wishing is for kids”.  I think the point of the statement is that rather than simply hoping for things to be different, or for some action to take place, I must be an instigator of change in my life.  I agree intellectually with that premise.  That being said I still find a reservoir of things that I’m wishful about.   

I wish I was a natural athlete.

I wish I knew then what I know now.

I wish truth was mandatory, sometimes.

I wish I knew how to heal the wounds I have caused.

I wish I hadn’t spent all that money on [fill in the blank].

I wish people, self included, would say what they mean and do what they say.

I wish I could keep the wheels of my emotions out of the ruts they tend to swerve into.

I wish my better angels held more sway over me.

I wish I knew how to help the people I see struggling.

I wish they would revise the recommended height/weight charts.

I wish the noise in my life wouldn’t drown out the whisper of the Spirit.

I wish I had enlisted when I was 18 instead of going off to find myself.

I wish more people could see deception when it occurs.

I wish my heart was softer.

I wish everyone in Washington would leave public service go live on a farm somewhere.

I wish I could explain how Christ has changed me.

I wish I would actually do half of what I want to do.

I wish I could forgive myself for the weight of things I believe the Father has already forgiven me of.

I wish I had ordered the medium instead of the large.

I wish I had chosen fealty over self-gratification.

I wish people understood that liberty carries an obligation.

I wish I understood what it means to love.

I wish I was one with the Father.

I wish my sins were gone forever.

I wish the trumpet would sound today.

8/31/10

Channel Fish

There is a gray cold desolation in the midst of the river of life,

a solitary channel which flows amidst the teeming waters. 

It is set apart, a stream unto itself,

its cold waters don’t mix with the warmer currents

cordoned off under an impervious thermal layer.

In the deep cold of the channel there is neither life nor light

only murky haze  

severed from the beauty of life.

In the great waters of the river there is joy.

Fish dance in schools twisting and sparkling with delight.

The waters are roiled by their exuberance

and the surface broken by their ecstatic leaps.

In the depths below

the channel fish sense the movement above

but do not comprehend its source.

There is no understanding,

no interaction between the channel fish

and the great waters above.

A channel fish cannot survive in the warmer flows.

It would surely smother in the closeness above.

And the fish of the great waters have no desire

to probe to murk of the channel,

polluted by the sludge and detritus of a million lost souls. 

The channel carries the reek of death

unnoticed by its inhabitants.

The river flows on as life in the channel ebbs slowly away.